Thursday, 12 January 2012

Flash, ahhhhhhhhhh!

"Yes, Flash! Flash Fiction. It's not about you.
Well, not all of it," said the sultry princess
How do I fill the void? Every week it's the same. I need to do something.

Then the answer came.

Nik Perring's Flash Fiction - An Online Course

When I don't have anything daft/interesting to say on this blog I can write some daft/interesting flash fiction. I'm a genius.

In case you are some cave dwelling hippie, flash fiction is fiction (obviously) that's really short. Not many words. Some people probably take it to the extreme and tweet it.

 So I signed up to the course and last week I completed my first assignment, part of which was the short, short story that is below.

Nik Perring
The course covers everything, from generating ideas all the way to being an efficient storyteller, sent via email so you can fit it in whenever you like, before work, after work, during work if you're really naughty (the last option is not advisable). Robert Mitchum look-alike Nik is friendly and quick to respond to any questions you have and  the work you send to him. It's like you've got a new best mate.

So moving swiftly way from the edges of stalkerdom, here is the first bit of FLASH! AHHHHH fiction I've written. It does not feature Flash Gordon, sadly. Though he may appear at a later date.

Here's the story. Just here. Bit nervous, like. It features me and Lauren.
Robert Mitchum


“I think you’ve missed all the major themes.”

I look up from the story at Lauren. She’s sat there, wide brown eyes looking back through curly black hair, head turned slightly away from me, corners of her mouth dipping slightly. They do that when she doesn’t want to upset or hurt me.

“What do you mean?”

“You don’t mention her sadness, her ontological insecurity in this situation—”

I squint, nostrils flare; all the danger signs.


“Ontological insecurity?”

“You made that up,” I say, smile and shake my head. There were way too many syllables for me to understand.
Onto- what?!

“It’s when…” Lauren pauses, watching my face, reading it. “Maybe you should look it up.”

She thinks I’ll shoot the messenger.

My fingertips trip over the keyboard and I’m reading about it, on Wikipedia; a source of truth as undisputed as the early Catholic Church. Yep, I definitely don’t understand this.

“Hmmm,” I finish reading and look at Lauren.

“What’s it say?”

“Insecurity that things will change, I think.”

“So yeah, she’s insecure that her lover—”
She's sad!

“I’ve only got one sentence to summarise it.”

“Oh,” Lauren says, and sticks her bottom lip out. I look back at the story.

“I’ll just say she’s sad.”

The End?

So there you go. If your interested in Nik's course you can find out about it here.

I'm thinking of decorating every bit of flash fiction I do with pictures from Flash Gordon. It's the future.