I knew it was bad once the bacon started to talk. Genetically modified food, it’s important; we can feed the world with it. But what I’ve done? No. Maybe the winged melons and centipede bananas will help reduce the carbon footprint. But bacon that tells you when it’s going off? Its rich voice decaying to a cracked squeak as the days pass. Cheery hellos when I open the fridge and squeals of excitement if my hand goes near it. The strange little song it starts to sing as it sizzles in the pan. I wake up at night hearing that song. I’ve started eating cereal, no milk though; I can’t open the fridge anymore.