Friday, 13 April 2012

Kickstarter Appeal: Robot Agent

So instead of doing something interesting tonight (like go to a fancy book launch in London) I'm at home trying to save money. But I think you'll all agree that the best way to save money is to make money (or rob people*). With this in mind, earlier today, on Nick Cross's blog, I mentioned maybe he could build a robot agent instead of finding a puny, human one.

People liked this idea.

So below I have my blueprints for version #1 of my Robot Agent and some of the technical specs. if you have any questions, please, don't hesitate to ask. Obviously I'll be requiring around about £1 million to complete this project and I have a pledge scale below and what you'll get for that pledge.

Pledge Scale

  • £100 - Robot Agent will represent you at one meeting with an editor/publishing professional of your choice.
  • £500 - Robot Agent will be turned on and represent you at one meeting with an  editor/publishing professional of your choice.
  • $1000 - Er, two meetings?
  • £50,000 - Robot Agent will turn up at a minor literary event of your choice and rampage. You can specify one target in particular.
  • £10,000 - As above but a major event.
  • £500,000 - Robot Agent will be let loose at the next London Book Fair and capture as many editors as possible for your manuscript to be presented to or to be forced to fight to the death in a giant spinning, flaming cage full of weasels.
  • £1,000,000 - Robot Agent will publish your book and force everyone in the world to buy a copy, every day, until you die.

Click on the image to see Robot Agent in its full glory!

Technical Spec.
  • Runs on a 486/Windows 95 box I have lying about in my loft.
  • Cogs and pistons are important and vital.
  • Wine tank carries 50 litres of wine for emergencies.
  • Chocolate is also carried for emergencies.
  • Speed estimates of 240,000,000km per second.
  • Probably indestructible.
  • Spiky.

Ladies and Gentlemen, place your pledges!



*Don't ACTUALLY rob people, ok?