Wednesday, 25 September 2013

Amazing Writing Advice #24: The Secret of Synopsiseses

Synopsisesesses or, as I'll call them from now on, the pointless part of a query. I mean what's the point in writing the whole book and then trying to squeeze the whole thing onto one page? Madness! If it could fit on one page it would be about 400 words long. I have concluded that the pointless part of the query is never read by anyone important so you can just put what ever you like in as it. Here are some of my favourites:

Kitten ASCII Art

(.   \
    \  |   
     \ |___(\--/)
   __/    (  . . )
  "'._.    '-.O.'
       '-.  \ "|\
          '.,,/'.,,mrf


All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
If you find yourself typing
like this, seek help!

The Words to Witch Doctor

Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang 
  Walla walla, bing bang
  Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang
  Walla walla, bing bang...
  Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang 
  Walla walla, bing bang
  Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang 

  Walla walla, bing bang

What ever you put, it will have no effect on your query. So enjoy yourself.

Cheers,

Mark